Chapter 13: What Forgiveness Is Not
Victor became eligible for a restorative accountability program during his third year in prison.
The program allowed people convicted of certain crimes to examine the impact of their actions. Victims could choose whether to participate through letters, recorded statements, or supervised meetings.
Sarah immediately declined.
Emily was eleven.
She had begun middle school, joined the film club, and developed a fierce dislike of bananas. Victor occupied less space in her daily life.
Sarah saw no reason to reopen the door.
Then Emily learned about the invitation.
Naomi had mentioned it during a legal review, assuming Sarah had discussed it with her.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Emily asked.
“I did not think it would help you.”
“That was my decision.”
Sarah felt the old pattern return in miniature.
An adult deciding what a child should know.
Protection becoming control.
“You are right,” she said. “I should have told you.”
Emily crossed her arms.
“Do you think I want to see him?”
“I do not know.”
“I don’t.”
“Then we will decline.”
“But I want him to answer questions.”
The program permitted written questions with no guarantee of response.
Emily spent several days preparing hers.
Why did you think Mom’s money belonged to you?**
Why did you want me gone instead of trying to know me?**
Did you ever feel bad before you were caught?**
When you did kind things, were you pretending?**
Do you understand that I still check where people put their feet?**
Victor responded a month later.
His letter was reviewed by counselors before reaching them.
He wrote that entitlement had grown slowly. He had convinced himself that Sarah’s money would become family money and that he was more capable of using it.
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He admitted viewing Emily as an obstacle rather than a person.
He said he felt fear before being caught,
